I know why monkey see, monkey do

Sometimes I think the peroxide women put in their hair goes right through their scalps and burns into their brains, leaving them with approximately 5% capacity to think on their own and actually be nice people.

Look, I’m all for positivity and ‘power to the woman’, fists smashing the air and burning bras, but there comes a point when you realise not all the ladies are deserving of your defence and they should truly look at themselves closer in the mirror.

What sets men and women apart is simple – bitchiness. Yes, I’ve said it and I’m sticking to it. It doesn’t matter how much of a nice or caring individual you claim to be, there is always going to be someone in your life who is fake and downright bitchy either to your face or behind your back, and chances are it’s going to be a woman. Have you ever called a man out for being a bitch or a cow? Men don’t gossip or backchat to each other, they tell it like it is and don’t beat around the bush.

A word from the wise to all those women who talk “the nasties” behind people’s backs and then pretend to be someone’s best friend – whatever it is you have a problem about, tell it to the woman’s face. Don’t hide behind an email or a cigarette and alcoholic beverage (okay, I know you don’t get that part but it makes complete sense to me), don’t say something horrid to another person and then deny it. Just say it outright – if you have an issue, open that gob of yours and speak your mind.

I mean, why bother be friends with people if you’re just going to be artificial and peremptory? What do you have to gain from it? And if you simply HAVE to surround yourself with the person you’re fake to (like extended family members or workmates), just say your ‘hellos’ and ‘goodbyes’ and leave it at that.

Oh, and a second word if I may – us ladies who are disrespected and bitched about and faked to know why you act the way you do. It’s jealousy. You’re jealous of our successes, our optimism, our goals, our dreams, our friends, our families, our relationships – everything about us, you’re jealous of.

So while I, and a fair few others, find it oh so flattering that at times you copy the things we do like a monkey would, please refrain from being a mean human being and just for once, just once, consider the feelings and emotions of the people around you because when you put yourself in those shoes, you’d feel the exact same way.

Only I’ve got the guts to actually say something.

There. There’s my rant for the day. That feels so much better now that I’ve gotten that off my chest.


  1. As a girl who works in a very make orientated environment I think you would be surprised just how much men bitch about people! They can be just as bitchy and gossipy and the girls!

  2. Love it !! And I know exactly the type of women you’re talking about …

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